I actually got a visual of you the other day. I was laying in bed reading and you started kicking, or punching, or rolling around or whatever it is you're doing in there that I can feel and I actually saw you do it. It only happened once, but it was pretty awesome getting to see it. You're dad is jealous - I can't blame him because I would be too if I was him! But I know it wasn't the last time I'll see you moving around.

People have begun making comments that can tell but don't know that I'm pregnant - like customers at the store. And of course other church friends who think I look so darn cute! haha! And I've definitely begun to wear clothes to show off the size you've made me :) I think I'm finally beginning to enjoy this whole pregnancy thing ... in fact I've reconsidered the never going through morning sickness part ever again.

Halfway There

I definitely get more and more excited as each week passes by. I love reading about the growth you've been doing each week and seeing approx how big you are and what new thing you've taught yourself to do. So many things you learn on your own while I carry you with me - it amazes me.

We got you some Cardinal gear yesterday. I knew your father couldn't pass it up, so I just happened to direct him down the aisle to pick out just exactly the right outfit for you. I can't wait until we can dress you up in it. It should be the perfect size for you when the season starts next year - you'll be old enough just in time :)

I think I've finally accepted having to be in the "spotlight". It really used to bug me when tons of people would come up and talk to me about you and being pregnant. Your dad says I'm just nuts - which I'm sure one day you'll agree with him haha :) - but I've never really been one for the center of attention.

Anyways I'm excited to see what the next few months will be like since honestly the first 3.5 were awful because I was always sick as soon as I got up. It's a joy to always feel you kicking and I hope you don't stop. You have already become my favorite thing in life. I love you Ethan.

Scared

I'm scared. I'm scared for you. I'm scared for me. I'm scared because I don't feel ready. I'm scared because I don't feel capable.

But yet I can't wait to have you in my hands, to see your face and your little hands and toes. I can't wait to shower you with love, to talk to you, laugh with you and play with you.

2/16/2010

"You started making me nauseous on Feb. 10 and by the 13th I knew something was up since I had to leave church in the middle of the day and slept all day only to wake up sick. So I had your father get a test and sure enough, I was right! So we found out about you late Saturday night in the middle of daddy's D-Now weekend. His reaction at first was, uhhh interesting to say the least, but it was due to a mixture of shock and being tired because the next day he was busting at the seams to tell people! We told a few close friends at church that Sunday and shared with your Grandma and Grandpa Taylor and Great-Grandma Taylor the next day. I wanted your Uncles and Grandma & Grandpa Milligan to all be together when they found out so we had to wait a few more days before we got to tell them. In fact, the plan is to tell them tomorrow, a week from when you made your presence known to me.

I can't tell you how excited I am for you to be here, and even though I'm not sure how long you've been with me I'm not sure I can wait a whole 9 months for you to get here! Especially if you continue to make me sick everytime I eat! :) I already love you so much and I hope you always know that."