Nursery

Your Great-Grandma Peggy and Great-Great Aunt Fay painted your bedroom for you. They are beasts when it comes to home repair. They helped us paint most of the house in fact and plan to come back to do some touch up on minor things. They've helped make the house our home.

I'm so excited, seeing your room. I'm ready for you to come and ready for all of your stuff! I can't wait to start putting things together, moving you in, getting your toys ready! Your dad and I are slowly getting the house together and ready for you. Although, I have a feeling we will still have clutter in the office/guest bedroom when you arrive.

I hope to get some things up on your wall tonight since that's all I really can do at this point. I still have to fix up your dresser that your Great-Grandma Milligan gave us. When she graduated from nursing school in the '40's, she and some friends moved into an apartment. One of those friend's boyfriends crafted this for them to use as extra storage in the kitchen. Your Great-Aunt Carolyn used it for some time as a regular dresser. I'm sure other family members have used it from time to time since then as well. I'm so excited to give you a family antique like this and still in decent shape - it does need some touch up, but it's not falling apart! It makes me happy to know I can pass on history to you in this way. Plus it means a lot to me because I know Grandma Milligan doesn't have much and to have an antique like this from her means a lot to me and I hope it will mean a lot to you also down the road.

I love you little Ethan Taylor. I can't wait to have you in my arms.

23rd Birthday

I had my 23rd birthday two days ago. That's how old I'll be when I have you. Going off my schedule, I'm only two years late, but I'm still happy with how things have gone in life. I don't think I would change them. I always wanted to have kids young because I always felt like the reason my mother and I weren't close was because there was such a huge gap between us. She was 39 when she had me. I didn't want that to be the case. Granted, we are much closer now that I've grown and moved out and become an adult living her own life, but I still feel like I missed out on something by not having a close, happy relationship most of my life with her.

It's weird, having this birthday. I almost didn't want to focus on it. Like it's not even important. You have consumed my world in so many ways. I want people to be obsessed with you like I am, that you should be their world like you are mine.

The doctor reminded me, 12 more weeks. That seems like such a short time, of course if you say 3 more months that seems longer! But I still can't believe I'm in my last trimester with you. I look at myself and I can't believe it's that far, it doesn't seem possible, you don't seem big enough looking on the outside.

I love you Ethan, more than you know.

Showers

Why do throwing parties have to be so complicated? Why do I have to be involved when I'm the guest of honor? Just tell me the date and I'll be there, you do everything else. I don't want to have 50 million showers. I don't want to have every weekend of one month filled with these things, but if it has to be that way then so be it. I don't know why families can't work together on these things instead of getting in each others faces and wanting it done their way.

On top of that I have to deal with your father and not wanting to go shopping to register for stuff for you. It's been very frustrating. I'll seriously just go myself except I don't want to ... lol, I like second opinions when I shop. I will say this, with all the showers and people involved I'm sure you will be one very spoiled and happy baby!

As the day gets closer all I want to do is focus on you, but I can't. I have to worry about work and school and finding time in between that to get the house ready for you. I'm so excited to get it ready for you but I'm stuck. Stuck until the bathroom's done, until the ferrets are gone, until your room is painted. People keep telling me that I should keep you in our room for a while, but why waste your room, especially if my old bed will be in there? I'll just sleep right by you - that'll be better for me since I don't do well being woken up and getting little to no sleep :) but I'll deal with it for you.

Be glad you're a boy and won't have to deal with showers and all that goes along with it, let your future wife handle it ... but be helpful at the same time, even if she doesn't act like she needs the help, offer - you might be surprised.

I can't wait to see the type of man you'll be. I pray that you won't be the stereotypical PK, but I think you'll definitely be an interesting kid between your father and me :)

I love you.